Get WIREd

The US government realizes that when the Sensenbrenner bill (HR 4437) passes and the South Dakota legislation on abortions is adopted quickly by other states, these laws will place new burdens on Homeland Security and local police agencies. The jails are filled up and deportation proceedings are lengthy and time consuming. A new underground railroad would be too inconvenient. And the results of back alley abortions would overtax our health care system. Thus, the government has taken an innovative and cutting-edge approach to the problem. Currently, a new bill is being introduced in the House that will allow for women and immigrants to immediately leave the United States - Back to Africa, Back to Asia, Back to South America - making it as easy as wiring money. Below are key details about the Women and Immigrants Rapid Exit (WIRE) Bill:

  • Beginning April 1, buses will depart daily from cities in landlocked states to major ports around the country, including those recently safeguarded against purchase by Dubai Ports World.
  • African Americans will not be allowed on the buses. They will be redirected to the nearest military recruitment center.
  • Children will also remain behind. They will be placed in schools modeled after the schools for Native American children that will educate them to function in American society and learn American values. Children under five will be given to adoptive families, replacing the current practice of bringing in babies from China and Korea.
  • Women without readily traceable immigrant roots will be rehabilitated in Saudi Arabia where the royal family has graciously offered them accommodation in exchange for important services as outlined in Appendix M.
  • Upon repatriation, certain people will be invited back to the United States through a guest worker program that will provide them with similar wages to what they were earning before being WIREd out of the US, no health benefits or access of healthcare, vacation time every year to go back to their countries, and early retirement. A fortunate few will even be able to work for their former employers.
  • Canadian immigrants are exempt from the program.
  • And the gays will be WIREd to Cuba.

Speaking recently to a government insider, we were told, this isn't an anti-immigrant bill. "This country has been built by immigrants," he said, "But it's obvious from the Little Pakistans, Little Koreas, and Chinatowns, that people miss their homes." He continued to say that the world has shifted and people don't have to physically come to the US to work for the US. Corporate America is in every village, every town, every city around the world.

If you think you might be eligible to be WIREd out, be sure to check this website for Call-In days to support the bill.

Comments

Add comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <i> <b> <blockquote>

More information about formatting options

CAPTCHA
This question is for testing whether you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.
7 + 9 =
Solve this simple math problem and enter the result. E.g. for 1+3, enter 4.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.